The Biggest Pillars of Life – Grandparents

If I ever speak about my life, it begins with two of the most cherished people — my maternal grandparents, Benay Kumar Das (Mantu Das) and Mira Das, lovingly known as Dadu and Dida.

My childhood was rooted in the warmth of our old big house, the nostalgic hum of the Ambassador car, and above all, the constant presence of their love. The house was sold in September 2002, the car in July 2007 — but those were just objects. What truly mattered was that my Dadu and Dida were still there, guiding me through every challenge.

Throughout the most challenging phases of my life, they remained my unwavering pillars of strength—offering not only emotional support and wisdom but a sense of stability and comfort that only true guardians can provide. Their constant presence and enduring care did not merely influence the memories of my childhood; they played an integral role in shaping my character, values, and the very foundation of the person I have become today.

I was just a month old when my Dida (maternal grandmother) brought me to their residence and cared for me lovingly until I was old enough to begin my schooling in Gangtok, Sikkim, where my father was posted at the time. Despite being away, I regularly returned to Siliguri during school holidays to stay with my grandparents—a tradition that continued until I reached Class 5, when my father eventually settled in Siliguri permanently.

As our new home was being constructed and I became increasingly involved in my higher studies, it became difficult to continue staying at their residence. Eventually, in September 2002, my grandfather made the difficult decision to sell the old family house. Some years later, he also sold the Ambassador car, as managing it alone became impractical. By that time, however, I had already learned how to drive under his guidance—an experience I will always cherish.

In December 2011, I moved to Kolkata to pursue further studies and professional opportunities. I later got married and have since been living between Siliguri and Kolkata, continuing this journey shaped deeply by the foundation my grandparents laid in my early years.

Life following that phase continued to be beautiful in its own way—enriched by the presence of my ever-supportive grandparents, my young and dynamic parents, and a loving, understanding wife. Everything progressed smoothly until 2019, when my grandmother suffered a minor stroke, followed by a period marked by my father’s serious illness. However, it was during the unprecedented challenges of the COVID-19 pandemic that things took a particularly difficult turn.

Despite the turbulence of that time, we gradually found our way back. With care, patience, and resilience, both my grandmother and father eventually regained stability—restoring a sense of balance to our lives.

However, the year 2023 brought an irreparable loss. On 7th February, my grandmother fell seriously ill and was admitted to Desun Hospital in Siliguri. Despite our efforts and medical care, she passed away on 13th February, a Monday. That was the first time I truly felt the profound absence of someone who had been an inseparable part of my life. I performed all the final rites, including the Ghat rituals, and completed the Badsorik (first-year ritual) on 3rd March 2024.

Tragically, a similar pattern followed with my grandfather. He became critically ill on 7th December 2024 and was hospitalized. Although he showed signs of improvement and was brought back home, he peacefully passed away on 25th February 2025 at around 3 a.m.

It is still difficult for me to come to terms with how swiftly life can change. Not long ago, people would say to me, “You are truly fortunate to still have your grandparents with you at this age.” Those words carried a deep truth—because their presence was indeed a blessing I cherished every single day.

But within the span of just two years, I lost both of them. My grandmother passed away on 13th February 2023, and my grandfather followed on 25th February 2025. The void they have left behind is beyond words—deep, constant, and profoundly painful.

They were more than just grandparents to me—they were my emotional anchors, my guiding light, and the heart of my childhood and early adulthood. Their love, wisdom, and unwavering support shaped me in ways I cannot fully express.

Losing them has been one of the hardest realities I’ve ever had to face. Their absence is felt every single day—in the quiet moments, in the old familiar places, in the memories that surface unexpectedly. It is not something one simply “gets over.”

I truly feel a deep sense of loneliness without them. Their presence was a comfort, their voices a reassurance, and their blessings a source of strength.

I miss you both deeply, Dadu and Dida. You are irreplaceable. Your memories live on in everything I do—but life is simply not the same without you.